flaws and all...

As humans criticism comes naturally.  We consume it, we ruminate over it, we spit it out.  We let it fill our lives, thoughts, and words.   And although we’re really great at criticizing others, we truly EXCEL at criticizing ourselves.  We have a (sometimes constant) tape running through our heads of all of our “shoulds” in our lives—what we should look like, what we should be doing, how we should be as people.  And in an effort to fulfill those, we put only our best face forward for all the world to see.  Only a select few in our lives are allowed to see us at our worst.  We do this because we believe that by putting our best face out there it will bring us affirmation and help relieve some of the “shoulds.”  Yet, the opposite somehow rings true.  We are actually only serving to feed that criticism and as a result the negative tape just keeps on rolling.  See, if everyone only shows their best, then we begin believing that the best is actually the average. And if my best is your average, then my best is no longer good enough.  We begin holding ourselves up against each other, living in a constant state of comparison, criticism, and self-deprecation.     If we only see beautiful and talented and successful and amazing in front of us all the time, we feel unable to compete.  Soon enough, we stop trying. And perhaps we never “should” have tried to begin with. 

 

I was thinking about all this today as I was deleting pictures of myself off of my phone b/c they didn’t meet certain standards.  Lazy eye and dry skin.  Asymmetrical or blemished.  Blah.  And if I allow myself listen to the negative tape, I can go on about more things than just my looks. I can share about my unmet expectations in my life, my job(s), my relationships, and the list goes on.  BUT…It’s time to hit the stop button and throw that tape out.  Cuz the tape isn’t the last word.  And ultimately, that negative tape is not the truth.  The truth is that I am deeply loved and fully accepted, flaws and all.  And that same love and acceptance goes for all of us.  We are beautifully and wonderfully (and intentionally) made (Ps 139: 14).  We can lay all of our striving for those “shoulds” aside.  Actually, the best place for them is at the feet of the only One who is able to give us what we are looking for-- fulfillment and rest.  (Psalm 65:2, Matthew 11:29)  So, see ya Mr. Negative Tape!  It’s time for you to go.  There’s something and Someone better I’d like to listen to. 

 

And perhaps it’s time for all of us to put our flawed faces forward. 

 

 

 

“All of your flaws and all of my flaws,
When they have been exhumed
We'll see that we need them to be who we are
Without them we'd be doomed.”

Bastille—Flaws