rants continued

sorry for the sudden end to my last post. the 5:00 whistle blew before i knew it!

back to my thoughts on our "promiscuous culture".....

i lament over the pervasiveness of our cultural attitudes towards sex. hook-ups are not only commonplace, but expected. women are now supposed to be "just like men" in all aspects of life, including their sexuality. if a woman wants to attach after having sex, she is needy and undesireable. don't expect him to call. don't get emotionally involved. keep it casual and fun.

yet, didn't God design sex for bonding us together? it seems like we try so hard to fight some of our created intents. physiologically our bodies release a hormone called oxytocin every time we have sexual contact. that chemical is the same one that is released when mothers breastfeed. it serves as a bonding agent, creating a sense of trust and safety. so, although, try as we might to "detach," somehow, our bodies have an agenda of their own. (looks like God wanted it that way) so, here we are, allowing our "desires" and "impulses" to rule....yet, finding that there are other impulses (i.e. bonding) that we would rather stifle. we can't have it both ways....

just like our desire for freedom of sexual expression for everyone--it all has a price. we try to break roles and expectations, yet we still find ourselves following culture. somehow our attempt to free ourselves has caused more bondage than we expected.

rants

so, recently i read a book called "girls gone mild" by wendy shalit. yes, as you can tell it's a take on "girls gone wild," and let me tell ya, it's anything but. wendy (a jewish 30-something) seeks to point out the need for modesty and respect in a culture permeated with sexual messages. she shares examples of how our children are influenced by these messages from an early age. everything from Bratz dolls to Abercrombie and Fitch are speaking into the lives of our children, telling them that in order to be accepted you have to be "hott," "sexy," "playful," and "fun." i was enraged. sure, i knew that we live in a very sexualized culture that wrecks havoc on the minds of our children, but i didn't realize the extent to which this occurs. blame it on the fact that i live in a bubble sometimes...

that brings us to the issues of today. it looks like here in the 21st century, we are reaping what we have sown. our parents' generation, the baby boomers, brought on the "sexual revolution." they were huge proponenets of femnism, freedom of sexual expression, and fighting the rigid expectations placed upon them at that time. yet, what do we have 50 years later? STDs, broken marriages, and sexual issues out the wazu. not to mention the goal of "freedom" for women has actually created the opposite effect. once, women were expected to be beautiful homemakers and the perfect wives. they were asked to have dinner on the table and to fulfill a role of submission to their husbands and families. their life was in the home...not out in the workforce or on the battlefield. we have come a long way.

yet, now in 2010, we ask women to be the "bad girls," to be appealing to men sexually, and to use this avenue as power. a woman is expected to go to work and to be successful. she is looked down upon if she decides to "stay home" or live a modest lifestyle. is this not as much oppressive as the first time around? women are still expected to fulfill certain "standards"....the only difference is that the morality of the matter is now erased. the value we place on the new standard is in the "lack of morals," rather than on the inclusion of them. it is just as important to us to erradicate all moral expectations as it was for those living in the 50's to incorporate morality. it's just a matter of what we value most. looks like we value anti-morality. hmm...seems like we have a problem.

this is only the tip of the ice berg. i'll be back later for more thoughts....stay tuned...